Think of the Best

Sadness had begun to inhabit me. Normally I’m happy and yet a cold, gray, gloom gripped me like ivy to a wall. I never remain sad for any lengthy time but now it had shaded my outlook for a week.

 

Seeking to lift it, I turned to Gurumayi Chidvilasananda’a wisdom in her book, Kindle My Heart Vol ll.

 

She tells how her Guru, Baba Muktananda once spotted her wearing a doleful look on her face. He asked “...why are you sad?” 

 

“I don’t know,” she responded.

 

“Baba said, ‘Perhaps you are thinking of the worst. Think of the best.’

 

“When he said that, I realized it was true.”

 

Gurumayi explained that the circumstances as they were could have made her joyful. “I could have written a great thesis on what had happened, but somehow we have this tendency to think the worst,” she wrote.

 

As I pondered these words I realized that I was thinking the worst too.

 

Constricted by dementia, June, my wife of 62 years, was being cared for in a skilled nursing facility after 18 months from her initial diagnosis with me as her primary caregiver. 

 

June had been in this new care for just over a week. This became necessary due to my own recent diagnosis of prostate cancer and need for treatment. This didn’t make it any easier for not only was I grieving her absence from our home but worrying that she might not be adapting well to her new situation.

 

Prompted to “think of the best”, I began assessing the benefits brought by June’s new place: first, she was less isolated than at home with a friendly companion sharing her new room; she had the support of nurses, assistants and office staff on call; she had the option of  a week’s varied activities from Laughter Yoga, to Hallway Huddle Meditation, to Nail Bar on Wheels, to Life Enrichment & Therapy Collaboration, to Balloon Toss in which to participate – or not.

 

I was especially pleased to see an attractive poster in a corridor headed: “Sacred 7: Be Heroic; Have Integrity; Be Patient; Show Compassion; Give Respect; Encourage Positivity; and Embrace Teamwork.”